


talk, walk, back your shit up

by onceandforall



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Established Relationship, Gen, Going back home, Good Boy Sakamoto Ryuji, POV Sakamoto Ryuji, Post canon, Ryuji and the girls, Sakamoto Ryuji Needs a Hug, all the girls kiss ryuji, how much self insert can i fit into one fic, ryuji grows out his hair, the relationships are all background
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:28:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25741336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onceandforall/pseuds/onceandforall
Summary: Ryuji wants to talk about how great it feels to be able to run again, but how lonely he is all by himself. How he has only a few friends, but no one he can really trust. Not like the Phantom Thieves. He doesn’t think he’ll ever find friends like the ones he left behind here in Tokyo. The friends that are leaving him behind as they go on to actually do things with their lives.And Ryuji’s stuck. He’s afraid that if he doesn’t do something about it he’s going to get permanently glued down.orRyuji and the girls and kisses.
Relationships: Kurusu Akira/Sakamoto Ryuji, Sakura Futaba/Yoshizawa Sumire | Yoshizawa Kasumi
Comments: 10
Kudos: 101





	1. ANN

**Author's Note:**

> I JUST LOVE SAKAMOTO RYUJI !!!!!! 
> 
> this originally started from the idea that sumi and ryuji were both big jocks and probably would enjoy time working out together and then spiraled into ryuji getting advice (and kisses!) from the girls of the pt. minimal royal spoilers. if u haven't played it yet, you should be good. 
> 
> iloveryuji 
> 
> thanks :) 
> 
> once 
> 
> (also i dont have a beta so if u spot a typo, feel free to point it out. thx!)

Ann’s not surprised when Ryuji tells her that he knows how to braid. Honestly, if it was anyone else  _ but  _ Ann, he’d be surprised that they were not surprised. But it’s Ann, one of the few people in the world who know him almost as well as his own mother. For better or for worse, they’re each other’s best friends. 

“Where did you learn?” Ann asks, taking her hair out of her signature pigtails and shaking the curls out. Ann’s hair is controlled chaos. It puffs out in every direction, her anti humidity hair products badly losing the war against Tokyo’s summer wetness. But there are indents where the ponytails were, Ann’s hair stubborn to lose their iconic shape. 

Ryuji is sitting down on the edge of her bed. Ann sits in between his legs. She hands Ryuji her hairbrush and he gets to work. 

He sections off her hair first, right down the middle. He’s found it easier this way. It would be easier with wet hair, but even though Ann had showered she had refused to get her hair wet. The reason for it goes way above Ryuji’s head. “When my mom isn’t working the night shifts, she has me braid her hair after she showers. I used to hate it at first. But now I just find it calming. I sometimes braid Akira’s hair, but it’s too short to really do anything.” 

Ann snickers. “You’re such a momma’s boy.” 

Ryuji rolls his eyes, even though Ann can’t see him. “Yeah, yeah. Tell me something I don’t know.” 

“Oh don’t tempt me,” Ann laughs. “There are  _ sooo  _ many things that you don’t know. I don’t even know where to start.” 

There’s a knot in Ann’s hair and the brush gets stuck on it. Ryuji yanks on the brush anyway and tries to not laugh when she yelps. “You deserved that.” 

“Maybe I did, doesn’t mean it still doesn’t  _ hurt. _ ” 

Ryuji brushes the rest of her hair in somewhat silence. The only noise is the whoosh of the brush as it glides through Ann’s hair and Ann’s soft humming of some melody. Ryuji knows the song from somewhere, but he can’t quite place it. It’s probably some Top 40 track that’s constantly blasting out of every speaker. 

Braiding hair has some type of a mindless effect on Ryuji. His fingers have done the movements so often that he can rely purely on muscle memory. There’s only a little bit of concentration needed, and that’s just because Ann has a different hair texture than his mom does. But after he gets used to that, Ryuji zones out. He wasn’t lying when he told Ann that he finds braiding hair calming. 

When he’s finished with both the french braids, he makes sure that her hair ties are secured. He pats her on the shoulders and Ann uses her phone’s front camera to see Ryuji’s handiwork. 

She takes a selfie and sends it to the Phantom Thieves group chat. It’s still active, even though the group has evolved from supernatural crime-fighting, world-saving teenagers to a group of dorky, almost always complaining about academics teenagers. The group chat will probably explode once they get Ann’s selfie, talking about how cute her hair is and asking why the hell they are together. But Ryuji’s phone is buried deep in his backpack and Ann puts her phone away the second after she presses send on her message. 

“You weren’t lying,” Ann says, leaning her head against Ryuji’s thigh. If it were anyone else, he’d get nervous from all the skin contact. But it’s Ann. And Ann may be the most beautiful girl that he’s ever seen, but him and Ann don’t really work like that. (They’ve tried.) “I’m impressed.” 

Ryuji falls back against the bed. Ann’s bed is like a cloud, filled with cushion and an endless amount of pillows. For a second he wonders how she sleeps. Does she actually use all the pillows? Put them around herself until she’s cocooned into a fabric? Or are they all decorative and they end up on the floor when she sleeps? Ryuji  _ is _ staying at her house for the night, so maybe it’s an appropriate question to ask. 

“So what are you even doing here back in Tokyo?” Ann asks. She doesn’t wait for Ryuji to reply before she asks her next question. “Is this why you were wondering when I was going to be back home?” She snorts. “So you had somewhere free to crash?” 

“Yes,” Ryuji says, answering her second question and completely ignoring the first. 

“...Do you not want to talk about it?” 

Ryuji does want to talk about it. He wants to talk about how great it feels to be able to run again, but how lonely he is all by himself. How he has only a few friends, but no one he can really trust. Not like the Phantom Thieves. He doesn’t think he’ll ever find friends like the ones he left behind here in Tokyo. The friends that are leaving him behind as they go on to actually  _ do  _ things with their lives. 

But just thinking about all these things makes his head start to spin and makes his chest ache. His eyes burn, and he has to squeeze his eyes to stop the tears from coming. He came to Ann because Ann is his best friend, and she knows when to push things and when to leave things alone. 

“We don’t have to talk about it,” Ann says, voice soft. She has one hand wrapped around Ryuji’s ankle, the other hand slowly tracing the scar on his shin. 

“Can we watch a movie?” 

Ann laughs. “Of course. My pick though. This is my house and you are staying here for free.” She squeezes Ryuji’s ankle and then sits up. When Ryuji doesn’t move to get up, she sighs and plops down onto the bed next to him. 

Ann pokes him in the cheek with her finger. She has a manicure, so her nails are all long and pointy and it hurts more than it would normally. “Is it Akira? Did you have a fight or something?” 

“No, we’re fine.” Akira and him are great, actually. Well, Akira is great. Akira is  _ always  _ great. It’s almost as nothing can phase that kid. They had finally gotten their shit together a few weeks before Akira left to go back to Inaba, and they make time in their busy lives to go visit each other. 

Ryuji knows, logically, that Akira is just as much of a human as Ryuji is. That he has his own hardships and worries, but Ryuji has been stuck in a rut for the past month and it’s starting to scare him. It reminds him of when things were  _ truly  _ bad, and he’s afraid that once the depression ball starts rolling it is not going to stop. Things are supposed to be getting better, his life, his leg, the world. But Ryuji can’t help but feel that something is missing. 

Ryuji needs something to chase after, whether that be a college scholarship, revenge on a shitty teacher, or hell, even saving the goddamn world. And now, Ryuji feels like he’s in limbo, with nothing to keep him tethered. 

Ryuji takes in a breath and sits up. Ann follows him. She grasps his face and turns him so they’re looking eye to eye. She stares at him, her blue eyes round and piercing. She leans in, kisses his cheek, and then lets him go. “Movie time?” 

Ryuji lets out another breath. He’s going to cry at some point in the night, and Ann is going to listen to him and maybe cry with him and definitely give him the reassurance he needs. But that’s later, and this is now. And now is movie time with his best friend. 


	2. MAKOTO

Ryuji and the city have a weird relationship. He was born and raised in Tokyo. The city is him as much as he is the city. He grew up using the subway lines to get to school and home again. He knows the city, knows its best spots and the places to go when you wanted to be left alone. Tokyo is his. 

Leaving was one of the hardest things that he ever had to do. Making the decision itself was difficult enough, but if the Phantom Thieves taught him one thing (other than a quick crash-course of first aid for things that were either too small to be waste magic on, or things that were actually major but they didn’t have any magic left to heal it. He’s fixed up stab wounds, both freezer and fire burns. Not well, mind you. But he did a decent enough job.), it was that he had enough will inside of him to become his own person, carve his own way in the world. 

And even though Tokyo is big, Ryuji couldn’t grow the way he wanted here. He needed to get his leg properly fixed and get his grades back on track to make going to university a possibility again. He knew that it was going to be slow going, and that it was going to be hard without his friends, but actually leaving the place was difficult. 

Akira was already gone by the time Ryuji left. The gang had driven him all the way back to Inaba, met his parents, stayed the night, and then drove all the way back to Tokyo. When Ryuji left, they were all gathering together to say multiple goodbyes. Ann and Ryuji were leaving the same day, one overseas and the other just a few hours away. But they both were leaving. 

Ryuji cried when he left, Ann too. Haru bawled her eyes out and Futaba was an ugly mess of snot and tears. Sumire kept dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief, not letting the tears go back her cheek. Yusuke and Makoto were the only ones that held it together, but even then it was by a thin margin. Ryuji was glad that everyone didn’t break down. None of them cried when Akira left. They had talked about it before, and they agreed that they should all try and keep the tears at bay. For Akira’s sake. They knew that if they cried, Akira wouldn’t leave them. 

And Akira  _ had  _ to leave them. The same way that the Phantom Thieves  _ had  _ to dissolve. The same way that they all  _ have  _ to go their separate ways. 

But here, without their leader, things felt more vulnerable than ever before. But it felt good to cry. 

It was lonely without the gang. Ryuji kept himself occupied, went to all his physical therapy appointments, kept his grades up, tried to make friends with the kids in his class and in the track team. He’d even let his hair grow out, and didn’t bother to bleach it.

But he missed the city. The suburbs suck. The city was always alive, always something interesting going on. And even if Ryuji didn’t want to do much, the options were all there. He had the choice to do nothing. In the new town, Ryuji didn’t have the choice. There was just nothing to do. It was driving him crazy. 

He came back to Tokyo on a whim. Well, he talked to his mother about it first. She would have to excuse him out of a few days of school. But Ryuji’s mother just made sure that he had a place to stay (Thanks Ann.) and let him leave. He also had to wait until he knew that Ann was going to be in town. He knows that if he asked any of them back in Tokyo that they would gladly host him for a few days (Sumire would have probably been the hardest to convince. Not herself, of course, Sumire would have loved to have Ryuji over. But Ryuji wasn’t sure her parents shared the same sentiments.) 

Makoto was surprised by Ryuji's call. He knows that she was trying to hide it, but he could still tell from the way her voice was abnormally high when she answered the call. Ryuji gets it -- the Phantom Theives are as thick as well, thieves, and Makoto is a trusted friend. But Ryuji would just rather text than call. 

They agreed to meet up at Ryuji’s favorite ramen shop. He’s been here a million and a half times, sometimes with his friends, most of the time alone. He came here a lot when he was booted off the track team and didn’t have anywhere else to be. Ramen is always filling, both for the soul and for the stomach. 

“You’re a nice face to see,” Makoto says, kicking his legs underneath the table. She’s watching for his shin; she’s always watching out for him. If Ann is like his twin (Futaba jokes that the two blondes in the group share a brain cell. He wonders what Futaba would say now that he’s back to his natural black color.), then Makoto was his older sister that he tries really hard to impress. It’s hard to  _ not  _ want to do your best when around Makoto. The air around her pushed you to think faster, think better, and act accordingly. Ryuji at first found it annoying, but now he’s grown used to it and being back in her presence is calming in ways that Ryuji did not expect. 

“It feels weird seeing you with your natural hair color,” Makoto continues. “I like it though. You look more mature.” 

“Thanks. I just got lazy,” Ryuji replies. He twirls the noodles around in his bowl. He doesn’t know why, but he’s not as hungry as he thought he was going to. It’s not like you’re going to get ramen this good back in the little town that Ryuji now calls home. 

No, scratch that. Tokyo will always be home. His friends will always be home. 

“How are you doing, Makoto?” 

Makoto sighs. “I’m… okay. I keep thinking that there is something I should be doing, other than studying. I guess my brain hasn’t fully registered the fact that we don’t have to fight anymore. And I can’t really talk to many people about it, you know. I’m sure my therapist would be thrilled to know about the Phantom Thieves.” 

“You’re seeing a therapist?” Ryuji sees a therapist too-- but not the mental kind. He figures his body goes through enough therapy as he tries to get his leg back to 100%. 

Makoto nods. “Yes. Both me and sis are. It’s different from what I had imagined it would be, but it’s nice. It helps keep me a little calmer and a lot more rational.” She slurps at her bowls, loud enough for Ryuji to get that she’s done talking about that certain topic. “So enough about me. What are you doing here? Not that I don’t love seeing you, Ryuji.” 

“I don’t know,” he answers truthfully. There was too much to say: that he feels suffocated and lost. That he really just wants to be with his friends again, fighting alongside themselves and sharing their blood, pain, and victories. “I’m having a hard time adjusting.” 

“I completely understand.” Makoto looks at Ryuji. Really looks at him. Her red eyes stare right at him. Makoto and Ryuji are more alike than one would think. Even though they express it differently, they both have a strong competitive spirit, a deep protective instinct for the people they care for, and heaps and heaps of admiration for Joker. It makes sense that Makoto is the one to get it. “I’m glad you’re here, Ryuji. I’ve missed you.” 

Ryuji laughs and is surprised when the laugh is wet. It’s not a laugh at all, it’s actually half of a sob. He swallows it down and then laughs again. “Who else are you supposed to talk to about Shounen Jump? I’m assuming you’re all caught up.” 

“You caught me on a good week.” Makoto holds her hand up to her mouth as she smiles. “I’m totally caught up.” 

The rest of the dinner passes by with a joyous levity that Ryuji hadn’t felt in a while. They walk out of the store together, towards the train station. Ryuji offers to ride with her all the way back to the place she and Haru share and Makoto thanks him, but tells him it’s okay. 

“So, does Akira know that you’re here?” 

Ryuji shakes his head. “I didn’t tell him. Ann might have told him, but I don’t think so. It’s not like he’s here anyway. He probably knows from the photo that Ann sent, but I haven’t told him myself.” 

“I’m glad you two have each other. Your relationship is very comforting. To be honest, I didn’t think you guys would work it out. I thought he was going to leave and that was going to be that. I talked to Ann about it a lot. You two really made me quite incredibly upset.” 

Ryuji tries to find words, but he opens and closes his mouth without any luck of finding the proper thing to say. 

“Sorry,” Makoto says. “Was that too much?” 

“No,” Ryuji finally says. “I just was thinking the same thing too, back then. But then I couldn’t just let him go like that, you know? I had to at least tell him how I felt, damn the consequences.” 

“You’re a really good friend, Ryuji.” They’re at the station now. Makoto takes a left and Ryuji takes a right. They stop in front of the ticketbooth. Makoto turns so she’s facing Ryuji. She leans up and presses a light kiss on his cheek. 

“Thank you, Makoto. For what it’s worth, you’re a good friend too.” 

Makoto flushes and turns her head away from Ryuji. It’s always so amusing to see what will embarrass her. “Goodbye, Ryuji. It was nice seeing you again.” She rifles through her bag to find her subway ticket. 

“So, when are you going to say something to Ann?” Ryuji asks, a smile on his face. 

Makoto flush turns dark red. “Goodbye, Ryuji,” she stammers out and Ryuji can’t help but laugh. He loves his friends and he loves teasing them even more. 

“Bye, Makoto!” he says, watching as she passes through the subway gates. 

  
Maybe he  _ should  _ tell Akira that he’s back in Tokyo. 


	3. HARU

Ryuji is not going to lie, at first Haru scared him. It was only after some time that he realized that Haru was just a teenager -- like the rest of them-- that had some shit luck. She still does scare him, sometimes. Especially when she tilts her head, smiles with enough malice to strike a man dead from ten feet away, and then say the sweetest thing that is truly just an insult wrapped up with a fancy satin bow. It’s scary to watch in real time. Ryuji never wants to get on her bad side. 

But Haru is also one of the nicest people he knows, always willing to lend a hand and an ear (and some cash) to whichever of her friends needed it. So when Ryuji is late to their meetup, Ryuji feels absolutely horrible. 

“I’m so sorry,” Ryuji says, sliding into his chair across from Haru with so much momentum that the chair almost slides out from under him. He’s sweaty from having run all the way from the subway station, and a part of him is proud of himself for being able to run quickly for that distance without his legs giving out. The other part of him is just embarrassed. “I forgot which line to take and I got lost.” Ryuji’s only been out of the city for a little bit, but it seems like that time was enough to throw all of his metropolitan savviness in the trash. 

Haru smiles. “It’s okay. I got your text, so I wasn’t too worried. I did order us something already.” Haru passes him a menu for him to look at. “Feel free to get anything else, though. I just got us some fruity drinks.” 

“You’re the best, Haru,” Ryuji says. The menu has a  _ bunch  _ of sweets and Ryuji makes a mental note to tell Ann about this place, if Haru hasn’t already introduced her to it. Ryuji’s not so much of a sweets guy, but with Ann and Haru as his friends, he’s acquired the taste for sweet things. At least in moderation. 

Their drinks come by shortly and they both order their meals. Haru orders some kind of crepe cake and Ryuji gets raspberry waffles. He’s excited to see how nicely decorated their food is going to be. For a place like this, with real linen tablecloths and waiters decked out and no prices on their menu, Ryuji is going to be truly surprised if the food doesn’t at least look aesthetically pleasing. 

He’s so glad Haru offered to pay. 

“You know,” Haru says, stirring her straw around in her drink with the point of her index finger. “Makoto told me about your hair, but I didn’t really believe her. You look like a totally different person.” 

Ryuji nervously laughs. He runs a hand through his hair. It’s getting long and he needs a cut. He already made a drastic change with his hair color, he’s not about to make another dramatic choice and grow out his hair. At least not now. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” 

Haru flushes. “A good thing, of course,” she rushes out. “I didn’t mean any offense. I think your hair looks lovely.” 

Ryuji shakes his head. “No worries, Haru. I was just teasing.” 

“Hmph. I’m glad. May I ask why you let your hair grow out?” 

Ryuji shrugs. “Got tired of bleaching it all the damn time. Ann said she was surprised my hair never fell out of my head. But I guess, I needed, like, a physical change,” Ryuji replies. His fingers play with the edge of the tablecloth, finding a loose string and gently pulling at it. “I think it was me telling myself that we had to move on to new things. A new life.” 

“How poetic,” Haru says. She leans forward onto the table and takes one of Ryuji’s hands in her own. Ryuji’s heartbeat spikes as he notices a table near them start to watch them. It’s two girls, probably the same age as them. They’re probably gossiping about the two of them, wondering how a punk like Ryuji ever managed to get a sweet girl like Haru. Ryuji can’t blame them-- Haru and him make a mismatched couple and they aren’t even together. 

“I’m really glad you came back to Tokyo,” Haru says, her hand grasping Ryuji’s wrist. “I know we all missed you. Maybe me a bit more than the others. Who else is supposed to help me with my gardening? The fertilizer bags aren’t exactly light enough for me to carry. Yusuke is good for his brain, not his brawn.” Haru laughs and squeezes his hand before letting him go and sitting back in the chair. 

A warm feeling bursts in Ryuji’s chest and climbs up into his throat. He coughs to get it out, but it’s still there. “How is gardening going, by the way? And the plans for your cafe?” Ryuji changes the topic with an abundance of other topics. Anything else to stop talking about himself. “And university? I guess you’re pretty busy, huh.” 

“Busy enough,” Haru agrees. “Not too busy to stop seeing my closest friends. The plans for the cafe are slow going. To be honest, I’m getting frustrated with the bureaucracy of it all. I call Akira on the phone sometimes, just to rant. You know, he was the one to really help get it all off the ground. It’s nice to get his advice on things.” 

Ryuji agrees. Akira helped him out of his own little funk (Okay; so maybe it was really traumatic and not that little. He’s still getting himself back to normal, one therapy session at a time.), which is one of the reasons why Ryuji fell in love with him. Ryuji figures that all the Phantom Thieves are a little bit in love with Akira. He’s never really felt jealous about it-- with a person like Akira it’s really hard to  _ not  _ fall at least a tiny bit in love with him. 

“I want to open one by the end of next year,” Haru says. “Making the recipes, of course, is one of the latter things to take place. But I don’t think doing early research is going to do any harm. Thank you for being my research partner, by the way. I think I’ve worn everyone out everyone that’s still in the area with an overabundance of sweets, if I’m being honest.” 

“Glad to be of service,” Ryuji laughs and for a brief moment he wonders if this entire meal is going to be billed to Okumura Foods. But then Haru literally  _ is  _ Okumura foods so it doesn’t really matter that much. Besides, their food comes right as Ryuji starts that thought and then it leaves the second he smells his waffles. 

It’s  _ delicious.  _ At least in the smell. Also, it’s a startling pink color. Even the whipped cream is a pastel pink, topped with more raspberries and strawberries as garnish. Ryuji let’s Haru take photos of both their foods (And a picture of him with the food. And then a selfie of the two of them that goes straight to the group chat. And the girls at the table next to them definitely think that Ryuji is dating Haru. Not that he minds-- Haru would be  _ so  _ cool to date. Also incredibly out of his league. Actually, Akira is also out of his league so maybe he should just stop thinking about that now.) 

They eat quickly. Ryuji has truly never had such delicious waffles, which is why it’s funny when Haru finishes eating, pushes her plate a bit away from her, and  _ hmphs.  _

“What’s wrong?” Ryuji says. Well, he tries to say it, realizes that his mouth is still horribly full. Then he swallows and tries it again. “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing.” Haru shakes his head, her curls bouncing with the movement. “It’s just okay. They definitely get points for presentation, but the food itself was just sweet. Nothing special about it. Sometimes sweet food is okay, but I want the food at my cafe to be memorable. Something people keep coming back for.” 

Ryuji wipes off some powdered sugar off of his chin with his napkin. “Talking like a real business person, Haru. Your cafe is going to be great.” 

Haru smiles and it makes Ryuji feels grateful he has friends as good as she is. Haru’s been through the ringer and then back again, but when Ryuji had done the same thing he become all pointy, sharp edges. Haru instead had softened out. They balanced each other out well, and even if there was a lot to catch up with, neither of them felt the need to fill every second of silence with unnecessary conversation. 

They finish their food, pay, and head out to enjoy the last moments of sunlight the day has to offer. Tokyo, thankfully, hasn’t gotten to its unbearably humid phase yet (Not to say that it  _ isn’t  _ terribly humid yet. It’s just not the worst humidity Ryuji’s ever been in.), and the sunset’s air is crisp. Ryuji takes a whole breath in and feels relaxed. 

They wander for a bit window shopping and browsing through things that catch their eyes (Ryuji almost buys a book on cats. Not because he actually likes cats, but because the cover has a cat that looks exactly like Morgana and Ryuji knows that Akira would get a kick out of it. But it’s way too much money for a picture book about cats, so he settles for taking a photo of the cover and making a mental note to send it to Akira later), before Haru realizes the time and embarrassedly calls for her ride. 

“Would you like a ride?” Haru asks after her quick phone call to her driver. She told him that he’s around the area, so he would be arriving shortly. “You’re staying at Ann’s, correct?” 

“I am,” Ryuji confirms. “But it’s okay. I think I need some time to take in the city. And think a little bit.” 

“Understandable.” Haru nods, a forceful action that makes Ryuji think that she really does understand. Her driver pulls up a minute later, and Haru waves him over to where they’re standing at the edge of the sidewalk. “Ryuji,” she says. “Do me a favor.” 

“Hm?” 

“Bend down please.” 

Ryuji bends down, confused. 

Haru kisses him in the middle of his forehead. “You looked like you needed that,” she says. “It was a pleasure to talk to you again, Ryuji. Please do visit me. We all miss you terribly.” 

Ryuji stands back up and flushes. “I miss you guys too.” 

“Talk to you later, Ryuji!” Haru says, shooting Ryuji a sweet smile before getting into the backseat of her waiting car. 

Ryuji watches the car until it turns a corner and it disappears from his line of sight. He’s missed his friends; he’s missed the city. He made the right decision in coming back for a visit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> futaba and sumi part will be up in about a week!


	4. FUTABA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ngl this one was the most fun to write :)

Futaba cackles – full on cackles; straight out of an anime type of cackle– when Ryuji agrees to go to a manga shop with her. 

“I’ve been here before,” she clarifies as she leads Ryuji down the streets of Akihabara. She weaves through the crowds like an absolute pro. Ryuji is impressed. “By myself, even. But sometimes even if I don’t really  _ need  _ the company anymore, it’s fun to have someone to explore with.” 

“There’s a plan here that I’m missing,” Ryuji says, because he knows Futaba likes to have plenty of cards up her sleeve. When he called Futaba (and Boss!) up, he was expecting Futaba to cajole Ryuji into buying an unhealthy amount of snacks and playing video games with her up in Akira’s attic. But she wanted to go out with him. Out to a store. “There’s an evil plan that I’m missing. What have you gotten me into?” 

“Nothing,” Futaba says in that tone of hers that makes a cold shiver rush up Ryuji’s back. “Nothing, nothing.” 

“Is it like something heavy? Something you need help carrying?” He grabs the shoulder of Futaba’s jacket and pulls her out of the way of a guy that’s way too invested in his phone and not at all aware of the busy street around him. “Am I just muscles to you and nothing more?” 

Futaba laughs again. “Please, if I needed muscle I’d call, like, Makoto or something. Or Sumire. Probably Sumire, actually. Have you seen her abs? She actually has defined abs. None of you boys have abs.” 

“I don’t really do weights,” Ryuji defends. “Mostly just cardio. Also, Akira definitely has abs.” 

“Abs, shmabs. Sumire could take you all down in a fight.” 

Ryuji has to at least give her that. His workout regime has starkly changed now that he’s not doing any Phantom Thief work. At least now he can run without the fear of his leg buckling out from underneath him. “That’s probably not wrong.” 

Futaba stops walking. “We’re here!” she sing-songs. “Come, let’s explore.” 

They’re in front of an Animate store. One that Ryuji knows well, actually. He’s gotten plenty of copies of manga from here. But he really only stays on the manga floors. Futaba leads them up to a floor that Ryuji’s never been to. 

"Seriously?" Ryuji asks. He doesn't want to even take a single footstep into the floor, but Futaba grabs his hand and uses all of her strength to drag him through the aisles. "Why are we looking at doujinshi?"

Futaba snickers. "We're looking for a certain type of doujinshi, actually." She leads him through the aisles and Ryuji feels so  _ awkward  _ here. He's not the only guy on the floor, but this is a part of life that he's never been in. Sure, he knows it exists. (Even knows that there are a few fairly popular Phantom Thief doujinshi which just confuses Ryuji.) But for him, he reads a manga, likes it, and waits for the next issue to be released. He doesn't do anything more than that and he  _ certainly _ doesn't read doujinshi. 

"Why did you have to take me here?" Ryuji asks. "Why not someone who would like, actually appreciate the art? Why is Yusuke not here but I am?"

"Inari has already been with me here," Futaba replies. "He has this dumb idea that there is such a thing as high art and low art. I'm trying to get him to see that he's a dumbass. I’m here with Sumire a lot, but you’re in town!" Futaba stops at a shelf of comics, lets go of Ryuji's hand, and opens her hands wide, like she's announcing a surprise. "Look at these bad boys!"

They are Featherman comics. There are so many of them. Ryuji doesn't know how to respond– the only Featherman that he has watched has been with Futaba herself so he is not the biggest fan– so he just shrugs his shoulders and says, "Cool."

"Very cool," Futaba clarifies. "Actually super cool because I have a point card and that makes it so I can use a discount on my next purchase. And that is called being savvy."

"I'm pretty sure the discount is only like 5%."

"But it's a discount," Futaba counters. She waves  _ go away _ motions with her hands. "Now go find something interesting while I figure out what I want to buy. You standing next to me is making me nervous."

"Fine, fine," Ryuji says and he walks away, leaving Futaba to mutter to herself in front of the bookshelf. He wanders the aisles and is almost tempted to leave the floor entirely and go back to the manga section or something. But he doesn't, because he knows that while Futaba might be comfortable traveling here alone, she might not like it if Ryuji were to up and vanish on her. He decides to stroll through an aisle that doesn't have any people in it.

He browses the spines of the doujinshi. There are so many types, all with flashy covers and some sealed shut with large 18+ stickers on them. But then he sees it.

It's not his face. The world doesn't actually know what the Phantom Thieves look like. If they did know what he looked like, then he probably wouldn't be able to go around Tokyo without getting spotted and hunted down by either revengeful police or fanatic followers. But while the world doesn't know what they look like, the general public has a pretty good grasp on their costumes.

Back when they were taking down Shido, their costume-clad selves were replayed over and over again by the people curious with the Phantom Thieves. The video didn't show much, but it did show their silhouettes and a vague colors scheme.

But the general public got at least the Skull Mask correct. It doesn't actually look like his. His is more metal and the one on the cover looks like it's made from actual bone, or something at least that's an offwhite color. The uniform isn't the same either, but Ryuji knows that it's him on the cover.

He has a doujinshi just about him.

Well, it's about Skull. But Ryuji is Skull. The same way that Skull is him. So it's practically about him.

He can't help himself. He starts going through the bookshelf, pulling out comic after comic. There's one of Makoto –her eyes are gray and her costume is way more revealing than it actually is– and Haru. Haru's design is surprisingly faithful to what she actually looks like. Her hair color is black, though, which makes it seem that she is much more serious and downtrodden than she actually is. There's one of every member of the group –sans Sumire and Akechi which is pretty reasonable to be honest. Those two weren't part of the Phantom Thieves at the time.

But an overwhelming amount of comics are about Akira. Joker's domino mask works surprisingly well in a drawing and Ryuji is amazed by how similar to reality his design is. It's almost like he could reach into the paper and pull out the actual Joker. The dialogue, on the other hand, is horrendous. Joker sounds more like a mafia boss than the dorky teenager he is. Everything that the characters (And yes, Ryuji has to remind himself. These are characters, not at all based on the actual people behind the mask.) say sounds like something out of a bad soap opera whose main plot point is something dumb like the protagonist losing her memory after falling down the bottom two steps of the stairway.

Ryuji doesn't touch the porn stuff. He can't even open it anyway, because they're plastic-sealed shut. But for his own peace of mind, he doesn't even think about opening them. Most of them are Joker and Skull centric, with some Joker and Fox mixed in. It's not something that Ryuji is interested in. (At least they got the Joker and Skull thing correct. Were they always that obvious or was it just a major coincidence?)

He picks up the one that first caught his eye. It's weird seeing himself as a cartoon. Even weirder to read himself as a cartoon. It really doesn't feel like him at all. The real Skull doesn't do any of the things that his comic-self does. He has half of a mind to find the artist on social media and let him know all the things that they are doing wrong, but that's too much, even for Ryuji. Besides, it's not like that author has anything to base it on. It's not like the Phantom Thieves had time to give the public a speech on how they actually act and how their group dynamics actually are.

"Oh my god. You found it!"

Ryuji turns and freezes when he sees Futaba standing at the edge of the aisle. She has a few comics already in her hand, but her wide eyes are focused on what's in Ryuji's hands.

Ryuji fumbles. He doesn't want to be caught looking at Phantom Thief fan made things, so he hurriedly shoves the comic back into the bookshelf and then puts his hands behind his back like he wasn't doing anything wrong.

Futaba walks over to him and scrunches her nose. "What did you do that for? It's going to get all ruined." She frowns and gives the comics over to Ryuji to hold. "I've been looking for this Ryuji cover  _ everywhere." _

"You've–. Wait what?" What is Futaba doing looking at Phantom Thieves doujinshi?

"I know you can hear me just fine, Ryuji. I've been looking for him everywhere!" She pulls out the comic, straightens out its cover and smiles. "I have everyone else's cover, but not Skull's!" She brandishes the comic to see, as if he wasn't just intently starting at it a minute ago. "Isn't he so handsome? The hair color is wrong though; you should really let the fan community know that they need to update their image of Skull."

Ryuji doesn't know if he should agree or not. It feels like another one of Futaba's set ups, so he just nods his head in confusion.

"I'm so glad he was here," Futaba says. "I was going to be so upset if I had to go to another store. I've already been to five already! Skull is too popular."

"Skull? Is popular?" Ryuji asks, because the last part of her sentence sticks out to him the most. No way that he's the most popular. But then the rest of Futaba's words kick in and Ryuji shakes his head. "Wait, you brought me all the way here because you wanted to buy a Skull doujinshi?"

Futaba smirks. "Of course! It's always best to work with the original material, don't you think?" She starts walking to the register. "Come, I'm excited to use my discount."

Ryuji walks with her. Of course this trip wasn't just for the fun of it. Futaba likes to pull tricks, make things more fun for herself. He's glad at least that it wasn't an 18+ comic that she was buying. Then maybe they would have to have a nice talk about boundaries. But this is just amusing.

Granted, Ryuji doesn't find it all the amusing until they're out of the store, Futaba swinging her plastic bag full of goodies with every step. But the more he thinks about it, the more Ryuji realizes that it is pretty funny that they bought Phantom Thief stuff. It's pretty funny that Phantom Thief merch actually exists.

"Hey," Ryuji says, having an idea that probably only Futaba would go along with. "Are there more places that have Phantom Thief merch?"

Futaba raises an eyebrow. "Yeah. Some of it is horrible, though."

"Do you want to go look for some more?"

Futaba smiles. "Skull, I thought you never would ask."

They spend the rest of the day scouring for Phantom Thief products. There are loads of pins, buttons, and even gacha machines that have everything from Ann's mask to their tophat logo on them. It's fun, actually, to see what the Phantom Thieves have become post their disbandment. Ryuji buys a few decent items: a pin of Joker's domino mask, a standee that has all their outlines. Futaba laughs the entire way, but does offer her sincere help. She steers him away from the  _ trashy items that are going to break the second we walk out of this store, trust me  _ and leads him towards things that are well-made and sturdy.

They both end of the day with plastic bags of goodies swinging on their side. They end up back in Le Blanc. Boss was as happy as ever to see him and he laughed when both Ryuji's and Futaba's stomach growled at the same time. Boss's curry is even better than Ryuji remembered it being.

"I'm so full," Futaba says, her head leaning against the counter. "I don't think I will ever be able to eat again."

Ryuji laughs, but the movement makes him realize how full he is too. If he moves too much, he's going to burst. "I don't think I can eat again either."

Boss laughs. "You two are too much."

A few minutes later, when Ryuji feels less like an overinflated balloon and more like a human being with a working metabolism, Ryuji announces that he's going to leave. "Thanks for the food, Boss. And thanks for hanging out with me for the day, Futaba."

Futaba sits herself up straight. "I can walk you to the station!" she says, but she looks at Boss for affirmation. When Boss gives her the nod, she leaps out of the chair, grabs her plastic bag of goodies, and waits for Ryuji to walk out of the door.

The station isn't all that far, and Futaba hums as she walks. "It was nice to see you, Ryuji. Even nicer now that it's the actual you and not your doujinshi self." Futaba takes the Ryuji comic out of the bag and holds the cover against Ryuji's face. She contemplates for a moment, and then brings the comic close to her face, kisses it, and then holds it to her chest. "Though I'm so glad that I have him with me now."

Ryuji laughs. "Take good care of me, will you?"

Futaba nods, serious. "Of course I will. And take good care of your things too, okay? They are little things to remind you of home."

The hand that is holding his bag feels hot. He suggested that they explore for the merch mostly because it was funny, but there was a small part of him that wanted to take something from the Phantom Thieves back with him. Something that wasn't just his friends through their groupchat. Maybe the little trinkets will help him feel less lonely.

"I always forget that you know a lot more than you like to let on," Ryuji admits. "I'll keep them safe, don't worry."

"You better."

They hug, which isn't as nearly as awkward as Ryuji was expecting it to be, and say their goodbyes. Ryuji gets on the train back to Ann's place and stares at the items that he bought and realizes he doesn't mind if the people around him peg him for an obsessive phanboy.


	5. SUMIRE

Ryuji can’t… do all that gymnastics stuff. He’s tried. Sumire wouldn’t stop talking about how nice it was that Senpai went out to practice with her and all that jazz. She brought it up so many times that the second she even started  _ saying  _ the word ‘gymnastics’ Yusuke would all but get out of the room, away from the ideas of stretching and jumping and wearing tight fitting clothes while doing so. She’s not really subtle, not when it counts anyway. Kasumi was subtle, Sumire is just a dork. 

The one time he finally caved and went out with her, he was doing fine the entire way through. Sure his bad leg caused him a little bit of trouble, but the stretching actually felt good. It reminded him of when he used to go to physical therapy, get through all the pain and suffering, and end up with something he was proud of. 

Ryuji watched Sumire’s routine, gave her pointers that he was sure she didn’t really need (Her coach gave Sumire all the constructive feedback. Ryuji would just watch her tumble and twist and go, “Wow. That was bonkers.”), and admired when she finished with a flourish. 

“Your turn!” Sumire had said and Ryuji had grimaced but followed Sumire’s guidance anyway. He couldn’t walk afterwards. His muscles became so sore so fast that he wasn’t even sure what hit him. Sumire had to walk him to a bench where they both waited, sipping on water and passing back and forth a bag of trail mix, before Ryuji could feel his legs again. 

He swore never to do it again.

Sumire, though, had no faults with joining Ryuji on his workouts. They would regularly hit the gym together, sometimes with Akira and sometimes just the two of them. So it’s not too much of a surprise when Sumire suggests they meet up at the gym. 

Ryuji gets there early. It’s funny how things so commonplace, like walking to the gym and finding a locker and all that general routine that he used to do multiple times in a single week, seem forgein to him now. It makes him feel like an outsider, even when he knows he is not. 

“Ryuji!” Sumire waves her hand over her head when she sees him, her tone of voice gleeful. “Your hair!” After everything that happened, Sumire became much happier than before. Sure, she was still serious about her studies and her gymnastics and her bentos, but she carried an air of levity around her that made Ryuji smile. 

“Hey, Sumi. Long time no see.” They share a quick hug and then Sumire goes to check in and leave her stuff in a locker. It isn’t long until they’re both on treadmills, slowly warming up. 

“Your stride looks so much better!” Sumire comments. “You can really tell the difference that your physical therapy is making. Plus, I think you’re a little bit taller now!” 

Ryuji laughs. “Yeah, now that I don’t have to slouch to compensate for my bad leg, I am a bit taller. It’s weird.”

“New things are always weird. It’s weird without Senpai here, you know?” She pushes a button on the treadmill and starts jogging. “Actually, it’s weird without everyone there. Futaba’s there. We eat lunch together, but it’s not the same.” 

Ryuji can’t imagine what it would be like to go to Shujin and not have Ann nor Akira there with him. After everything they went through, Ryuji doesn’t know if he could have gone through the last year of Shujin by himself. The move was a good thing, on multiple counts. “I’m sure it’s weird for everyone. It’s weird for me too.” 

“How is your new school, Ryuji? Probably boring, huh.” 

Ryuji rolls his eyes just thinking about his new school. “It’s so boring. There’s also nothing to do there. I can’t imagine how Akira does it, living in the middle of the country. I’m just in a boring suburb. He’s really nowhere.” 

Sumire presses a button again and then she’s running. She’s still able to keep up an entire conversation though, which is impressive in and of itself. But then Ryuji also starts to run (it’s really just a little bit faster than a jog, but this is as much as he knows he’s capable of. One day he’ll be able to fully run again), and he can’t talk while running. 

Sumire talks though. She fills him in on her life, little tidbits like where Futaba and her grab lunch (The roof. It’s still locked but that doesn’t stop Futaba), how her routine is going (Pretty well, actually. It’s amazing how much can change when you finally accept yourself for who you are. Futaba has come to watch her a few times), and the shopping that she’s done recently (She had to get new glasses because her prescription changed. But then she ended up getting the same style because she liked it too much. Futaba teased her about it). 

After thirty minutes of running, Ryuji’s legs feeling like jelly but in a satisfying way, they move onto the weights. Ryuji forgot how much he liked hanging out with Sumire. She’s like the little sister he never had, complete with go-luck-iness that’s just borderline on annoying. He’s sure that some things that he does annoys her to no end as well. Their relationship is incredibly familial.

Ryuji helps her adjust some of her postures, makes sure she’s not overextending and instead working out the correct muscle groups, and when it comes down to stretching, Sumire doesn’t hesitate to correct some of his forms and even push against his back to really get the full extent of the stretch. It’s a good balance; Ryuji wishes that he had someone like her to workout with all the time. Activities like this are always better with friends. 

Protein Lovers doesn’t have showers, so they just towel themselves off, load up on more deodorant, and then head out. They end up at Big Bang Burger, and Ryuji has to talk Sumire down from trying the burger challenge because even though she might have the guts to do it, she really isn’t proficient enough so maybe she should come back another day. At any rate, Ryuji doesn’t really want to drag an overly stuffed Sumire out of the fast food joint. 

She pouts, but ends up getting the biggest burger on the menu anyway. Ryuji gets his usual meal (Big Bang Burgers are truly  _ everywhere,  _ so he’s been getting the same burger and fries and iced tea even after he moved), and the two of them find a seat towards the back of the shop. Sumire devours her burger, and Ryuji takes a photo of her mid bite. 

“I look so gross in that,” Sumire says, wiping her face with a napkin. “But send it in the groupchat. I want to ask them if I should have taken the challenge.” 

“How’s your phone?” Ryuji asks. Sumire is always the worst to respond in the groupchat, even worse to respond to an individual message because of her damn phone. 

“It’s almost brand new!” she says. “Futaba got frustrated at me not responding so she fixed it the other day. Send me a text right now and I can show you.” 

Ryuji sends her a slew of smiley faces and watches as Sumire’s phone lights up with the message. She types back a quick reply and then a few seconds later Ryuji’s phone rings with the message. 

_ It works!  _ the message says. Ryuji laughs. 

“So,” Ryuji says after sending the photo into the groupchat. “You and Futaba, huh?” It’s kind of hard to not notice how much Sumire talks about Futaba. It’s almost like every other sentence that comes out of her mouth is about something Futaba did or said or something the two of them did together. It’s endearing. 

Sumire blushes. Her face becomes so red that Ryuji is afraid she’s going to burst. 

“We don’t have to talk about it,” he quickly backtracks. “We can pretend I didn’t say anything.” 

Sumire shakes her head. “Was I that obvious about it?” 

“Probably not as obvious as Akira and I were back in the day.”  _ Back in the day  _ like it wasn’t just a few months ago. Right after they had (finally) gotten together, Ann had confessed that if they hadn’t done anything about it then she and Makoto and Haru were fully ready to lock them in a closet together until they confessed their feelings. Ryuji was and is glad that it never came to that. 

“You and Senpai were horrible,” Sumira adds. “So I don’t think that bar is that high.” 

Ryuji cups his hands over his heart, like it aches. “Ouch. That hurts.” 

Sumire takes a big slurp of her soda. “I don’t know how she feels. How did you do it, Ryuji? She’s… my best friend right now. I don’t want to lose her because of some dumb feelings.” 

Ryuji is reminded of himself and how much it hurt to be around Akira and not say a damn thing about his feelings. Especially when there were hints –little things like their hands brushing up against each other more than normal or the little smiles that felt like they were so much more– that there was something else between them. But the hints could have easily been something Ryuji’s mind just made up. It was difficult. So, Ryuji gets what Sumire is going through. Painfully well. 

“Futaba is an awkward kid. But nice. She’s not going to do anything malicious if it ends poorly,” Ryuji says. “Which I don’t think it will.” Futaba hasn’t ever outright said anything about Sumire in a romantic way, at least not to him. He should probably ask Akira about it though. If Futaba were to tell anyone about her feelings, it would probably be to her pseudo older brother. And while he can see Futaba being a huge awkward dork about it, he doesn’t think it would go anywhere bad. Both Futaba and Sumire are too good of people to let something like this ruin them. 

“If you really don’t want to confess, then don’t,” Ryuji adds. “Don’t feel pressured to do it. But, I will say that confessing feels like a weight lifted off your chest.” 

Sumire sighs. “Thanks, I will think about it.” She leans her elbow on the table and leans her head on her palm. “I didn’t expect training with you to turn into a romantic advice session. But, I can’t say it’s been bad. Thanks.” Sumire shoots up, her eyes narrowing. “Please don’t tell Senpai about this. Or Futaba.” 

Ryuji laughs. “Don’t worry, I won’t.” 

Sumire nods in thanks and they finish the rest of the food in contemplative silence. Ryuji’s mind wanders to Akira. Ryuji’s already traveled to Tokyo, what would be so bad about traveling to Inaba for a little bit? He probably won’t be able to go until a school break, but an end goal to look forward to might help him push through his loneliness. They walk to the station together, say their goodbyes with a huge back-cracking hug (Sumire is  _ strong _ ). 

“Visit more often,” Sumire says. “I could use another workout buddy like you.” She shrugs her shoulders. “No one else likes to workout like you do.” She leans forward and kisses him on the cheek. “Thanks, again.” 

“When I get back to running full time, we’re definitely going to have to compare PRs,” Ryuji says. Sumire smiles and they both wave at each other as Sumire walks into the station. 

Instead of getting on the train back to Ann’s place, Ryuji wanders. 

He decides that coming to Tokyo, while on a whim, was a good idea. He feels better now that he’s talked to the majority of his friends, filled them in on their lives, and was reminded by how much they care about it. It made him realize that even though he’s far away, that they’re not going away. Maybe everyone doesn’t always go away. Maybe some people stay. 

But Ryuji still misses Akira like he misses a limb; the pain is always there, always lingering. Ryuji looks at the time. His phone tells him that he has a good couple of hours before their scheduled facetime call. (Yes, they have a scheduled time. Ryuji did a lot of reading up on how to make long-distance relationships work and one of the things that he has found to be the most beneficial is setting up times that they both know they are free to chat.) But Ryuji calls Akira anyway. He needs to tell him he’s coming to see him. 

**Author's Note:**

> ayo find me on [twt](https://twitter.com/JINClTY) or [tumblr](https://onceand-forall.tumblr.com/) to cry about the pt with me :) 
> 
> once


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